Monday, May 2, 2011

Shifting loyalties...

I have heard and read in newspapers so many times that a celebrity was married to one, fell in love with another while he/she was married to some one else and then ditched and went out with else again.... I keep wondering how can loyalties keep changing from one person to another so frequently and that too in matters of love? 

There are so many celebrities who have strings of affairs and illegitimate relationships before they actually settle in for a marriage. In India, I guess this has been noticed much now in younger generations, both with boys and girls in teens and youth having many boyfriends or girlfriends, going on double dates. Now a days you watch any commercial which targets young audience, they show that it is easy shifting loyalties and yet fall in love again and again....

A mindset has sunk in that if a relation does not work out, they have options of falling out every now and then. Yes, to an extent I agree that you should fall out of a relation when it is not working, but you should ask a question to yourself, have I done everything from my end to save it? Or if the problem is with me, can I correct it? It is a blame game.... Even when you fall in love, you blame saying, "he/she made me fall in love with him/her."... when you are getting out of it, you will say, " she/he was always wrong and she/ he is at fault for this relation not to end." Its like you can easily transfer the burden of guilt of not working out on other person in relation, since you know you will never cross his/her road ever again.

Earlier, if a married couple had any issues, they would resolve it as much as possible and ensure they stay in the wedlock rather than drifting apart. I think its good way to deal when the issues are petty issues but not when there is major rift creator or which involves any violence or mental trauma to any of the party. but thanks to imitating all good and bad of the west, we also have learnt not to resolve issues but to kill it by falling out of it.. The question here is, why do we have to take the easier route of falling out rather than taking difficult route of adjusting and learning to resolve issues and stay together?

People have stopped trying and putting the efforts, which it takes to stay in relation and go on with it smoothly.Even on television, in daily soaps they show the main character falling in and out of relations and wedlock so easily.... by the end of serial they would be at least married 5 times...Is it so easy to shift your loyalties towards different people?

Like SRK mentions in the movie KKHH," Hum ek bar jite hain, ek bar marte hain, pyaar bhi ek hi bar hota hain." (but that's little contradictory to what he ends up doing finally, he marries Anjali as well.) I always believe that love is very precious and there should be only one such person in life whom you can shower your love with. Your time, mind, body and soul is just devoted to that person. But having said this, there are few practical situations as well which I have seen for myself. Two people in love having distance relationship and that falling out because guy/gal must be just fooling around and running away from responsibilities of getting married or in wedlock husband abusing wife daily, which I strictly disapprove of.

When you are in love, you respect the  person and you want to have the very best for things in life. In India, where emotions shown are more, it is just not that easy to forget such life altering experiences. Yes, life moves on but the feelings would have left  a scar on your heart forever. When one has a girlfriend or boyfriend, he/she just wants to be with the other as much as possible but when there are tensions, same people just want to seperate easily and find someone new in  life. What happens to all that emotions and happiness when things just issues arises? Is it so easy to forget your favorite hangouts, your frequently visited restaurants, parks where you sat together holding each other's hand,etc etc?

Things and situations in life keeps changing every second. But that does not mean you give up your love depending in bad situation. Then your love was conditional love which would stick only in good times. Every person has their  high and low points, but to stay with them and work things out is really a lesson we should learn from our elders and their elders. Freedom of expression in relation and life is always nice to have but also we should realize that love and marriage are not any games but life altering experiences and involves two people's entire life revolving around it. So no matter, how much independent we become, we should respect and love whom we call as our lovers/life partners. After hope is what we carry through our life.....................

1 comment:

  1. awesome preeti!!! I cant tell u how much I loved this post... I have some own views of mine and am gonna put it up on my blog instead of flooding ur comment section here. I am linking this link to my blog post.


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